dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
