He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
