that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
