On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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