office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
