Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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