I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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