Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
