VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
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