sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
