D3 body, D1 cock
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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