Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
