I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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