im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Randomize
