They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
