I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
