BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
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