White coat. Heels.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Randomize