I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
