She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
