I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
