hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
