The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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