did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
