can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize
