My hand turned me down
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
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