What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Randomize
