HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
