it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
