I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
