it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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