everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
