Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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