just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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