Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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