drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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