is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
