I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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