he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize
