Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Your shirt... Was in my pants
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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