spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
