wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
