the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Randomize
