Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
