Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
