So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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