Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
i think im in europe. pls send help
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
