Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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