I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
