there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
